When you take me in your arms,
That is where my paradise lies.
A home where only love and peace resides…😍😍😍
The moon is within me and so is the sun.With everything in me, I still feel empty. My silence is my strength and The ignorance, a bliss.
Sometimes, I just wonder what Am I born for. What is my purpose in this life? What am I doing and what am I suppose to be doing? Life changes everything. Life is a bitch but we make it more difficult I feel.
I feel I make it more difficult by expecting little things from others. Expectations hurts. It actually kills.
Life is actually not that good!
Its not that easy to understand nor does it makes you think of the possibilities.
Yesterday, It was one of those days wer i feel like even i need a hug and a shoulder to cry bt i am all alone pretending to be strong n holding up my tears n now spitting everything out to a person who can hardly do anything but listen but even that feels great. Sorry but sometimes i forget that I shouldn’t expect anything from anybody, not even wen their actions speaks that you can. I don’t know if i can reflect a pint of what i want to say. But what I actually did what to sum up is, “Life is all that you have never thought of, it is totally an alien.”
You’re breathing now, you might be dead another moment. Whatever you’re doing, just pause. Take a snooze and smile for everything you have ever had or lived in. Those were your jewels to live by rather than sitting over the pile up stones of bad people and memories. Go kiss yourself, kiss your palm, love yourself. That’s not wrong at all. Show your skin a little bit of love that it deserves.
When no one is ready to love you or say when it is not the phase you are feeling adored, love yourself.
She’s wrapping her life in her heart,Not ready to showcase to the world.
She’s tired of being the lost kind,
Yet not ready to be found again.
Stretching her arms under the moonlight each day,
Afraid to be known and disclosed.
She loves to be hidden with no hope to shine.
Tiny; she believes in the sunshines now
She wishes for wings but accustomed to the traps lead on the earth now.
Still she takes a flight to the world of dreams each night,
Returns back disappointed into the reality each time.
Lost hope, trust and faith to the so called love,
When hate is the only thing she had ever encountered.
Wanting to be freed with her soul trapped inside his memories
She is a myth.
A myth wanting to be believed.
She is a mystery.
A mystery carving to be understood.
She is a drama, a tornado to escape.
She is an echo, Uncleared and Undefinable.
She is a tale to be retold and relived.
Nor a perfect white gown,
Neither wears a sandal made of glass,
Not even cursed with long magical hair,
No prince charming to kiss to be awake.
She is born with fire in her veins,
Shielded with her own courage and strength,
Wears a crown made of her mistakes,
Yet feels like a princess who is born to rule.
Even she dreams of a kingdom made of love,
Her Prince Charming to care and serve,
Mesmerized by the sunset viewing from their window,
Even they will have one day a lived happily forever ending…
Will people understand me? My words? Will they read me? What will they feel? Relatable or unrealistic? These questions cross my mind every now and then.
I don’t want to live the kind of life, everyone around me are living. Scheduled, timed and monotonic to be glued to specific boundaries and limits. I don’t want to be those kind, maybe I can’t be. I wasn’t born to be like them. I feel like the wind, the air, omnipresent but not still. I wanna be around everything, learn everything and anything new. I wanna explore. I wanna know. I want to learn, be inspired. I also want to give, to teach, to guide, to inspire.
I can’t be stuck between the real me and the survival me, who is just being another human who is competing with everyone in this crazy world and society. I don’t want to prove or show anyone, anything. It never bothered me. Yeah, to my parents? Yes. Always.it always did and does…
But until when???
If I wanna live real, I need to speak. If I want an extraordinarily life, I should be ready to face the end number of difficulty and downs. If I want to fly, I should not fear of falling from high. I need to gear up my everything, my every cell together and energize.
One of the prove of my courageous decision was to get ink on my skin for lifetime. That was my decision without fearing for the consequences from my parents. I was brave enough that time, I guess. When I was younger, I feel I was more liberal and stronger than now. I fell in love without fearing of heartbreaks and disappointments. Whereas nowadays, a pinch of fear shadows around me all the time.
My voice needs to be clear again. My thoughts needs to nenefree free. My words need to be beautiful and real. So again, my heart could understand what it wants. I need to fall in love again… I need to live. I need to be free…even from myself, I feel.
Today, while talking to one of my friend. I debated on, “I DON’T NEED AFFECTION TO SURVIVE ANYMORE.”
And Yeah, I have to agree. Everyone needs love and affection to survive and so do I. Not the family and friends kinda love. We all do need them always in our life and I am no exceptionally different. But the love I am talking about is the soulmate, partner or the better half kind of which everyone needs in some walks of their lives.
Even now, I have a half blur vision of the person who will be with me like always (half has the image of the past). No matter how bad or good things or situations get, he will never leave me. Stick to me like a chewing gum. It will get irritating and irrational also. Fear, Jealousy , everything will set in but nothing will keep us apart. We will be like one soul in two different being. It’s cheesy but this is how love felt once and I know, it will happen again.
Even Today, after watching a romantic movie, I wipe my tears and smile like a fool, thinking about us and our love story. How beautiful it would have been??? So many more amazing chapters would have been written??? But no offense or regrets to anything done in past, may it be Loving you. You make me smile, even now. And that’s what reflects our love. HOPES HIGH!!! 🙂
#oncealoveralwaysalover #notthatserious #throwback #loveaffair #
That dullness in your eye,
Makes my heart shrink in that darkness of our past.
The cuddles, the lust, the passion to be attached with nothing but love
That was covered with the mask of differences, Disappointments and disbelieves.
So why don’t you smile for your betrayal, Oh’mister?
You conquered what you’re heart desired and now, repenting for what you’re heart cried for!
That dullness in your eye says all that I can understand!